Embracing the Wolf
by phlowergirl
Summary: Embry's imprint story not your classical story line but you know that if you read HFIA, Embry stuggles to find himself admist the choas of imprinting on Larke. Dark/moody wolf meets slightly messed up girl does it equal ture love or not?
1. Chapter 1

**Okay so here is the first intro chapter into what may will become the sequel to HIDING FROM IT ALL so those of you who read it great ENJOY those of you who didn't it can proabaly stand alone for the most part so ENJOY also.....**

Embracing the Wolf

The trees have always been my comfort ever since I first phased, the anger and loneliness of having to abandon my two best friends in the beginning always drew me away from everyone including those in the pack. The only times I was in their company in the first few weeks were upon being ordered to stay. My free will was lost for good reasons I concede to that now retrospectively but at the time Sam, my Alpha, was my enemy. Nothing and no one in the pack could draw me out of my shallow grave I was trying to dig myself; it pained me to see Jake and Quil around town and that is why I chose the trees. The trees did not hold any bad feelings towards me, the rumors I could not here out there, and most importantly I could find the seclusion I almost was never allowed.

Having our minds join isn't as great as you may think, yeah good for communicating orders and such but not entirely designed with personal privacy in mind. Every ill thought I had for my fellow pack mates rang loud and true in their internal ears. The depression and listlessness I experienced, there was nowhere to hide it. The three of them didn't understand and I saw it in their eyes far to many times, which only forced my eyes away from theirs.

Sam, Jared, and Paul all had reasons for keeping me close, keeping their eyes and minds on my actions weather in wolf form or as they forced my presence among their human bonding experiences. Cliff diving being one of Paul and Sam's favorite activities, main because our body heat takes some getting use to and the chilled water all but makes you feel normal if only for those first few moments.

Sam, though I referred to him as my enemy tried his best to bring me out of my hampered mental state. I felt the draw to be near them, my pack and I fought it tooth and nail, I denied it out right, and hid myself away in the darken depths of the forest only to be found, having to face their thoughts of pity and sadness the whole way home.

When I looked in the mirror back then I recall that my eyes were sullen and dark, the foreboding presence that was me all but dissipated as my two friends joined the pack. Jake's first phase though it brought me joy to have my friend back did not spur the happy reunion I had imagined, instead Jacob was torn, lost and beyond angry. Jacob took to being a wolf faster than most although it was obvious his heart was far from being in it. It wasn't until Quil joined our pack that the three of us actually were brought back to the reality of life. Once we faced reality and we were once again allowed to be near mere humans the perks of the physical changes in our lives came to light.

Yeah, I did say allowed, Sam was a strict alpha though I suppose he would have to be being only a few years older than the rest of us bumbling teens. He was afraid we would make his same mistakes, so he corralled us into a tight knit group and ordered us to keep away from anyone we might hurt. The ease up was slow and daunting, the select few here and there but his trust in us and our respect of him as our leader grew. It helped a lot that Jake was always pushing the rules and orders, making Sam think and many times reconsider what restraint we as young werewolves were actually capable of.

The body that comes along with being werewolf isn't none undesirable, I mean come on a girl's eyes may bug out on sight of me, ego trip if I may say so myself. I can have who and what ever I want, flash a smile take off my shirt and pow, the girl is mine at least for awhile. I am bound to screw it up or get board with her at some point. I realized about the time that Jared started getting serious with Kim that having relationships with girls for too long just gets messy. Hey, if I have the chance of imprinting on some lucky girl some day why waste my time wooing them when I can just flaunt my wolfish muscles and throw out the predatory smile and the prey is mine, so to speak.

So why now am I sulking here alone in the forest at all times too it is the middle of the night? Good question, I left my date at Paul's house, his little party getting a little crazy and the girl my interest flared and at about the time we left the spare bedroom it was gone. One of the guys will take care of her, take her home in the morning or something like that. They always joke that they clean up after my mistakes or conquests what ever you want to call the girl I have my arm around for the moment. I think I drank too much seeing as I am out here sitting on a long instead of being passed out on someone's couch. I rarely head back to my house, it is empty ever since my mother passed away and the elusive father figure never did find out his identity though everyone has their preference for whom they suspect. The house is a little lonely so I crash wherever, no one really cares I am part of the furniture, you know always around.

The wind whips by me and I slide to the ground, the chilly night won't bother my high temperature seeing as it runs at a heavy 107.8 or something like that nowadays. The log for my pillow the mushy ground sinking in against my sturdy frame as I resign myself to a peaceful nap on the earthen floor damp though it maybe I hardly feel it. It isn't the first or the last I will find my solace in the darkness of the forest, the solitude and quiet lulling me into a sleep that will no doubt be restless.


	2. Chapter 2

**Here you all go Chapter 2 hope it is all i hope it is...not quite to the meaty parts but hey it's Embry's story this time can't just jump into the middle of all the drama....EnJOY Thanks for all the reviews, alerts and favs makes me happy to see ya all wanting to read more... :) **

The chirping of the birds is like nails across a chalkboard in my ear, the merciless creatures drone on and on while my head pounds, my neck creaks, and I try to force myself back to sleep. A sharp kick to my ribs alerts me to someone presence, mainly Seth…why do they have to send that kid? Another jab in my rib cage and he is gonna be nursing a few more scratches and adorning himself with a few more scars, I growl low and grab his ankle. The slosh of the mud makes the movement worth it all as Seth falls ungracefully to his behind with a diminutive yelp.

"Hey, don't kill the messenger, not my fault Emily is worried about you and has Sam sending out his best wolf to find the poor hungover Embry Call." Seth's voice bellows out making me want to slam his happy face into the mud.

Yeah, best wolf my ass, little fiend has his head all high up in the clouds since he took on that vamp up on the mountain. Seth is always the one to come collect me, the beaming smile on his face tells me he is all too happy to be the one to come bug me. As he starts to stand I knock him back on his ass and stand now feeling that laying in the muck might not be an all day activity after all. Seth's eyes are still glinting with mirth as he pulls himself off the ground for the second time. What does it take to piss that little fella off? Not so much a morning person after one of Paul's parties, but any other time and Seth and I get along.

"C'mon nothing to fix that headache like some of Emily's cooking." Seth grins and I can't help but agree with the kid.

"Yeah, how far out are we?" I ask scanning the area and I frown taking in the familiar setting, I have woken up here a time or two.

"You're not even a quarter mile from your own house, Why didn't you just crash indoors and in your own house for a change?"

"Didn't want to make it too hard on ya, would you even of thought to look there?" I follow Seth through the trees his steps taking on the noiseless grace while I stumble and grumble along side him like an everyday human.

"Oh yeah I forgot to mention I think Paul brought your girlfriend over to the house…seeing as you left her last night. She is kinda demanding when it comes to questioning everyone about you, seems you pissed her off." He shrugs, that does not deserve a shrug it is something that requires me to rethink heading to his house for breakfast now that a demanding banshee will be there.

I run my fingers through my lengthening hair and scratch my dirty scalp, a shower would do wonders to get rid of this dirt I think as I pull a clump off the back of my head. I glance down at my attire and the rest of my body and am glad that everyone is at Seth's house instead of Emily's. She would have had the guys spray me down out back before letting me into her bathroom shower this caked in mud. The hose water may do the job, the cold water not really the problem, but it is kind of degrading to have Jake or Paul hose me off like a mangy dog.

The second I walk into the house Seth has to call out to Emily that he found me thus unleashing the raging 'girlfriend' I no longer had much interest in.

"Oh my God what the hell happened to you?" Her voice rings in my ears and I take in her jutted out hip and sleazy looking party clothes and cringe at my choice in women, I will have to start drinking after I pick them out. Her voice seems to echo in my ears drowning out the actual words as she continues and the only thing I actually hear is the squeak and obvious disapproving undertones. Geesh, you would have thought I knew her for longer than a few hours by the way she is acting. I look at her one more time and then it clicks I do know her…the clingy girl from the bar. I roll my eyes wondering how I could have chosen her out of the crowd; I roll my eyes and head up the stairs towards the shower. Yeah she is still talking but someone else will deal with her I hope.

She is gone by the time I come down showered and wearing a pair of Seth's shorts, mine much to muddy to even consider cleaning, now occupying the too small trash in the bathroom. The smell of the food clears my head as I slink into the kitchen and steal a pancake earning a disapproving glare from Emily. Baby Amaranth toddles over to me before I can extract myself thoroughly; I haul her into my arms hoping she is all smiles and good smells while I do so. She giggles at me pulling my hair in the process but truly she couldn't hurt me if she tried.

A few moments later I pass the child off to someone else, Jared's arms pull her into a warm embrace freeing me. I slide into a dinning room chair as my mouth begins to salivate a little too much, good cooking turns that facet on full blast. Before I drool on myself I swallow bring to my attention my need for something, anything my mouth despite the copious amounts of drool is surprisingly dry.

Emily swats me with a towel when she sees me enter the kitchen and I try and smile at her. She has a soft spot for me, that whole brooding depressed teenager thing sure got to her, even though she is only a few years older than me.

"I surrender Emily, just need something to drink." I cry out holding my hands up in surrender.

"Keep your grubby little fingers off the food until I tell you it's time to eat." She tries to chide me but the warm smile and tone make her none too convincing.

I throw her my patented Embry grin as I pour myself a glass of orange juice. My seat at the table is taken when I return, I can't complain too much seeing as it is Jake who took it, but come on I am the guy with the hangover here. Well, I am not the only one but Paul and Collin are not even conscious, at least I am up and appearing to be my joyful self.

"Sure you don't mind me taking your seat Em, heard you slept in the muck again." Jake chuckles.

"Yeah, yeah don't mind me I'll just haul little Brady here out of his chair." I grumble and am surprised to see the kid vacate the table; I'll have to thank him later or something.

"Geesh, don't harass the kid because you're too stupid to find a couch, bet you didn't even phase last night, you know it makes it easier to sleep in the woods with four legs and fur." Jake says standing up and pulling out the folding chairs from the hall closet, as he opens them I wonder why Brady didn't get them out or why I didn't think of it?

"Yeah, well I probably would have eaten a few birds and took a swipe at Seth if I would have. He kicked me in the ribs this morning!"

"Yet you grumble at Brady for me taking your seat, poor imaginary friend you have seeing as Seth came back without a scratch."

"Poor guy's defective, he would smile and laugh at me if I did take a swing at him."

"Hey, I heard that and I would not I can be every bit as intimidating as you." Seth defends himself as he bounds down the stairs.

"Whatever." I smack my head down onto the table thinking a nap before breakfast would be good.

"Get up Paul, Collin." I hear Sam sternly say as he enters the house, probably having a morning patrol, typical for him seeing as it is Saturday morning and at least three of us are useless after a good Friday night and more so if it is a great one.

Grumbling and a couple thuds later and I guess instead of lying on the couch they are now both on the floor. A heavy smack shocks me upright as Sam's large hand claps me on the back, my head reflexively pops up and I give him a slight playful growl. Disapproving looks from everyone else and a loud chuckle from Sam conclude the morning greetings.

"Breakfast." Emily shouts and suddenly the two hungover wolves on the floor are awake and at the table, enough chairs for everyone thanks to Jake. Sam settles Amaranth into the highchair and the second the platters hit the table we all dig in. Emily slides a plate to Kim with a warm smile before seating herself among us.

Typical Saturday morning if you ask me, though the banshee could have been avoided all together if someone would have sent her home last night, you don't see Paul or Collin bringing random girls to Saturday morning breakfast with the pack. Only me, my mind grumbles to me as I down my 8th pancake. Now if only I didn't draw Saturday night patrol this week all would be great, no girls for me tonight.


	3. Chapter 3

**Okay here you all go the next chapter hope you all like getting into Embry's life EnJOY and Thanks to you who reviewed i really do appricate it esspecially those i recognize from hfit. :)**

**Chapter 3**

Patrol, not always a bad thing when I am actually paired with someone who I can put up with, Paul, Collin, and sometimes Jake are okay to deal with, but anyone who imprinted geesh it gives me a migraine. Running with Paul is like watching an interactive porno where you actually feel like your participating, he usually runs through his latest conquests and triumphs while we run together and I in turn do the same. Collin he seems to look up to me and Paul slowly but surely following in our foot steps when it comes to women it's fun to push the kid during patrol to see what I can actually get him to think. Now Jake, it's a little different with him, seeing as he is beta of the pack, second in command and all that jazz, but for the most part he is my best bud.

It is always up to the draw about who we run with unless something serious is brewing, if Sam had it his way I would always be paired with the responsible ones, no fooling around when I have a built in conscious piping up in my head. Worse than Jiminy Cricket in Pinocchio, it's not that no one finds out when we take detours and fool around but it is hard to do with a voice in your head saying you shouldn't be doing that.

Patrolling with Sam is by far the weirdest, straight to the point mechanical and outright strict when it comes to making our rounds. He starts spouting off orders and you don't know where your brain and his disconnect, hell sometimes I am afraid of him actually commanding me to do something once again. Memories of that feeling make us both uneasy when it comes down to it, Sam has been respectful of us all free will included in that respect since we have proven ourselves to him. I avoid patrolling with Sam at all costs, not that I have anything against my Alpha no mutiny being brewed here, but Sam is just that Sam.

Tonight Paul and I have the rounds, both our Saturday nights coming up empty I guess. Well, Friday was a bust so I guess rounding out the weekend as a complete disappointment won't be all that heartbreaking. I go out to the woods early, wanting to be the first out there thus having my thoughts to myself for the briefest moment. The moment I look forward to is the split second where I am neither wolf nor man, in the half second during the change all is at peace. It doesn't matter if I am phasing in anger, that moment of utter nothingness almost allows my mind a little reprieve.

Paul's voice hits my brain like a bat to the skull, loud pulsating, and a hint of self-mockery. It doesn't take long for his mind to wonder back to the blonde he had during the party Friday night, almost sickening to think of how he treats girls, but my actions aren't any better. Paul always keeps the lights low at his house for various activities, the girls think it is all secluded seeing as their all too human eyes can't see much but our much less human vision has it's perks.

It is almost a game to us sometimes to see how far we can push a girl, how far is she willing to let us go in front of a crowd of people. The middle of the living room serving as the dance floor and the stage for whatever voyeuristic scheme one of us plans to implement. The girls are putty in our hands, it's the shy ones that are the most fun to toy with, making their morals go down the drain as our sick fantasies play out before an audience.

Okay, now you are probably pegging me and Paul and possibly little Collin as perverts but hell why be shy when we will end up sharing it all with the pack later. Our minds are open books, picture books at that and plus it makes it much more fun when I get to see it all from their eyes, instant candid home movies without the trouble.

"Hey Embry, Why did you ditch that girl so soon? I mean you probably could have had her all night." Paul voices and knocks me to the side a bit.

"Her mouth wouldn't stop moving." I grumble and regret my choice of words.

"That's not always bad thing."

"She prattled on about everything and her voice was like a vice on my brain, I couldn't take it."

"Ohhh, not to mention she wasn't as outgoing as you like huh?" I run up ahead of him and take the long route allowing him to easy off for the short cut around the edge of town.

"You know she called you her boyfriend Em, better watch out for that one." Paul's voice is still loud and booming but not as much seeing as we are a few miles apart.

"I know, I know don't remind me, or better yet do just before I make the mistake next time."

His loud chuckle is contagious and before long, we are both laughing. Focusing now on our tasks for the night we secure our land and boarder. Just before our patrol is over, we swing by the beach and slink up to the cliff in our wolf form, the thrill of hitting the water as a wolf is exciting, but frowned upon during daylight hours. Paul and I waste no time barreling into the dark depths of the icy water.

Swimming however is not the easiest while the only stroke you can to as a wolf is the doggie paddle on top of that wolves have short necks and large mouths, making waves very unfriendly occurrences. I manage to phase before I swallow too much liquid salt and head to shore followed by Paul, also donning his human skin.

Paul and I spit ways shortly after we both shake the water from our hair and wring out our shorts. It's too late to head over to Sam and Emily's house so I sulk through the shadows towards Jake's, his couch sounding better all the time. He will be asleep or out with the rest of the pack at a local bar. The heat from my body has my shorts almost dry as I head up the front steps to Jake's. The couch itself far from the comfiest but it has the benefit of peace and quiet. No one besides Jake would bother me here, no Seth kicking me in the ribs, and no clingy girls calling me their boyfriend, not like I ever gave her that impression.

The quiet snores coming from Jake's room alerts me that he is in fact in the house. I grab a some chips and settle in on the slightly too small couch. I roll around a bit trying to get comfortable. Sam and Emily's couch is by far the most comfortable; anything has to be better than Jake's 30-year-old dust bucket. I groan and as I drift towards sleep, I recall the last time I stayed at Sam and Emily's house on their comfy clean couch.

_The wooden screen door on the front of the house creaks as I let myself in, and smile at Emily who is scooping ice cream into bowls in the kitchen. _

_"Hey Em." I greet her running my hand through my hair, reminding me that I should cut it soon. _

_"Ice cream?" She says with a smile, I just shake my head with a half smile and head into the living room in search of Sam. _

_My hands shoved in my pockets I lean against the threshold wall just watching Sam feeding his little girl, since my thoughts are my own for the moment I take a second to let the picture seep in. He doesn't hold that calm collected mask when he looks at her, his emotions pouring out for all to see, in candid moments like these Sam the man shows through instead of the stern cold and collected Alpha. _

_"Embry." He acknowledges my presence and I flash him a smile before I push off the wall and head into the room. _

_"Sam." _

_"That's quite a mark on your shoulder there, you and Quil still not getting along?" _

_I roll my eyes we haven't gotten along much since he imprinted and it is no secret, our difference of opinions just seem to smack heads, not to mention his over-protectiveness of Claire. "Something like that, imprinting seems to have taken a toll on our friendship." _

_"You'll see Embry, imprinting is a life changing event, I'm sure you will experience it one day and if not falling in love rivals it as a close second."_

_"Sure, sure…I like having options; you know a variety of deserts to sample as I please." _

_"Embry! I would smack you if I thought it would make a difference." Emily's voice sounds harsh as she reprimands me, and this time the look on her face makes me feel slightly appalled at my comment, especially considering my company. _

_"Sorry Emily." I mumble as Sam rises to put the baby in her room. _

_"I have faith that you'll find that girl one day, you deserve happiness Embry." Her words are touching but for some reason I shrug them off and settle myself a little deeper into the couch. _

_"I wouldn't be so sure Emily, don't even think I would want that kind of responsibly." _

_Sam chuckles as he walks back in having heard our conversation easily regardless of the fact he was down the hall_.

The last sound I hear is the ticking of the clock above my head.


	4. Chapter 4

**Okay so here is chapter 4 hope you all enjoy don't know what else to write here so without further ado here you go thanks for all the reviews alerts and faves **

Chapter 4

Thursday night the night, all the college girls come out to play, the night the bars are crowded and the selection is great. The regulars are a little wearier and out of towners are raring to go. Why Thursday I haven't a clue, you think since they all have class still on Friday that it wouldn't work but I'm not gonna dictate their actions gives me a whole nother night to peruse the merchandise.

Now what I wear when we go out isn't the fashion statement of the year, usually I don a pair of jeans and a snug fitting tee. I like to show off my assets to the ladies let them know what exactly they are in for later. Stupid establishments actually require shirts so flaunting the naked skin like I do at the beach is out, though I am sure by the time I was kicked to the curb I would have a few takers on looks alone. My prowess to draw the attention of and gain the pleasures of opposite sex allows for my discretion, I can be choosy selecting the cream of the crop.

Tonight Paul and I walk into the joint my eyes take in the feast before them, tight skirts, jeans that kill me the slowly, and damn who ever told girls to wear shirts without sleeves knew the affinity I have for all the bare skin just teasing my imagination into overdrive. Red, blue, green and yellow the colors whirl by my eyes as I make my way towards the back of the bar, pool tables of green break up the streaks of colors, the clack of the pool balls rings in my ears drowning out the clanging of the glasses at the bar. The smell of smoke wafts through the room, dulling my sense of smell, though masking the large amounts of perfume some women are sure to be wearing.

Selection is simple and an easy eliminator to start with is visual, curves in the right places, sleek and narrow else where, but my preferences vary night to night. There is nothing more dull than fucking the same girl just with a different voice or scent. Tonight the variety is thick, blondes, brunettes, and a mix of shades in between. Eliminator number two scent…the pickings have to be slim for me to go home with someone reeking of noxious chemicals or what a few call perfume—sensitive nose remember. Scent by itself can be a turn on depending on what scents a woman is giving off, other men whoa nothing speaks touch me like another mans scent all over here, cross those girls off not gonna deal with it. When all else fails I say drink a bit more and selection a girl becomes much more simple when your senses are dulled.

Paul is an active pursuer he scopes out a bar like he is at Baskin Robbins, taking a sample of anything that looks good and continues until he finds something that he can't resist. At the moment he is approaching a tall blonde, short skirt and large glossy lips. My eyes watch him with amusement as he zones in on his prey, no words just a flashy smile and that is all it takes. Putty in his large hands, but way too easy if you ask me, where is the fun in that. Paul must be thinking the same as I watch him lead her towards the back of the bar.

I lean back against the wall and divert my attention to the pool games going on at the moment. Nothing really great there, no girls playing, flashing their chests as they bend over for the shot, nope none of that only arrogant guys playing each other for a pocket full of cash. I like to watch and take it all in, the silent watchful predator. Not many girls approach me tonight, the bar is overrun with outgoing pansies who toss those cheese pickup lines, melt a shallow girl's heart, before they get what they want. I try and be upfront, no relationship ties here just carnal delights.

The second she walks up to the bar I know I never saw her before and that makes it an almost instant attraction, long legs, dark jeans tight in all the right places. Her thumbs looped through her front pockets as she stands there waiting for her drink. Her is pulled into two tails one on either side of her head, child like essence streaming from her while her well developed form alerts my blood stream that the pressure will be rising. The urge to growl and steak my claim on her tonight rises, I push off the wall and prepare to make my move. The crowds are denser as I approach the bar. I have myself another beer and frown as I realize she has moved off.

I slide up next to the bar and lean against the counter, my eyes scan the room catching a glimpse of her as she slides into a table with a group of girls. Packs of girls are similar to my own pack yet much more ruthless if you ask me. Any altercation seems to result in banishment long or short term, the she-devils at the top don't settle for much less most of the time.

I approach the table cautious to take in who deems themselves leader of the inane group, I note it and focus solely on the woman in question.

"Hello ladies." I smile but want to roll my eyes at the tone of my voice, but in turn it has them all smiling and a few giggles reach my ears. My eyes zone in on her, wonder how to wrestle her away from her friends.

"You as innocent as you are trying to look?" I ask smiling at pigtail girl.

Her face reddens and I could almost shout at my triumph, "Wouldn't you like to you?" She replies and gets an elbow to her side from her friend.

"Let me buy you a drink." I say extending my hand for her to take, she does leaving her just purchased beverage on the table.

It isn't long before I have her giggling and just about willing to give me everything I want. I lean over her where I have her backed against the wall and whisper, "I want you."

She is quiet for a minute as if she is thinking my comment over but I notice right away that her decision is already made. I lead her out of the bar and back to my place cause it is frowned upon fucking on my friend's couches, despite the cold emptiness of my house if I manage not the turn the lights on the mess disappears into the shadows.

Typical awkwardness of the morning after bellows in my ear cell phone ringing, I don't have a cell phone I think as I groan and shove a pillow over my head.

"Hello." I hear a feminine voice answer and about time too, four rings of that awful song is enough to make me very cranky morning person.

I feel her get out of my bed and wonder for a second if she will care about the mess or the cold but sleep is more important and sounds like she'll have a ride soon enough. Mornings go much smoother when the girls are responsible and don't need me to take them anywhere in the morning, her friends must be worrying.

"See ya around cutie." I hear her voice call a while later and the front door slam. Beautiful morning though she could have stayed for another round before she left.


	5. Chapter 5

**Here you all go another wonderful chapater for you, Thanks for the reveiews they mean alot as well as the alerts and faves...if you haven't read Hiding from it all check it out goes along with this story but beware it will spoiler alert for this story haha anyway ENJOY **

Chapter 5

The birds call in the sky as I walk down the deserted beach; the air is warmer now that summer is here. Jake is around here somewhere and I know I smell Seth also, but seeing them isn't exactly on my list of things to do today. Why? Cause as happy go lucky as Seth is normally his spirits have been heightened by his sister being home, her graduation final—diploma and all first of us wolves to accomplish that.

You see Sam's eyes sparkle with pride knowing that one of his wolves accomplished the very thing him becoming a werewolf denied him. It is kinda creepy that all it took for the girl to be civil to him was for her to leave town, though I could see what looking at her and imagining what it would be like to be in Emily's place. Probably felt gutted every time she was forced to be near them or us, a constant reminder of what she will never have—Sam.

Apparently she has some big new to share with the pack, I wonder what, she never tells us anything about school sometimes I wonder what keeps her going back after every summer. The state of Ohio must be an interesting place to compare with what we have here in good ol' La Push.

"Embry!" I hear Jake yell at me and I roll my eyes cause I just know the world will be a whole lot quieter if I just keep walking.

"Jake, Seth." I greet them and turn to face my friends. "What brings you here yelling my name at that?"

"Thought you should know that there is a pack meeting tonight at the Clearwater's." Jake says chuckling at my ill humored expression.

"Whose cooking?" I ask wondering if Leah is gonna grace us with something different than the same old things Kim and Emily cook up.

He smiles at me knowing where I'm going with this, food and me crash into oblivion and when it comes to Leah cooking us up something we never had before my mouth starts water just thinking about it. Don't get me wrong I love Emily's cooking, nothing compares but I do like variety.

"You'll still be there Leah has news."

Seth pipes in, "Big news too, wonder what she's been up to you don't think she's pregnant do you?"

"No!" Jake just about growls out, moody guy if you ask me. I roll my eyes at the kid.

"We would know about that Seth, not like she could keep that a secret. We all knew when Emily was."

"Fine but you know how she and Jake like to hide stuff even when we are wolves." Seth grumbles obviously jealous of their ability to keep secrets so well. Guess it just comes down to the fact that out of the whole pack those two had some things to hide, motivation enough to learn the trick and learn it well. I tried like everyone else but my mind is an open book to everyone, secrets spread out to the world, well just the pack but that is as good as my whole world.

"Yeah, yeah I'll be sure to head that way since food is gonna be provided, any clue what?"

"Spaghetti I think I saw noodles on the counter earlier." Seth smiles licking his lips probably at the mere thought of food.

I flip my wrist towards Jake and Seth as I head away from the two and into the woods. I have a few hours to kill before I can even think about staking out the Clearwater's house for food. Always good to arrive early when the food is gonna be plentiful.

I fell asleep, damn the peaceful forest for lulling me to sleep. I glance at my surroundings and groan wondering how late I am for dinner, no matter I'm sure everything is waiting for me, where's the party with out Embry.

"Hey." I greet everyone as I step through the back door, the front room is full, couch is full and the dinning room also. I skirt by Amaranth in favor of crashing on the living room floor, stretching my back on the hard surface I am reminded why the forest floor is preferable, much softer. Dinner is almost done if smell has anything to do with it, the sauce thick and spicy while the pasta is starting to have the starchy smell indicating that it is nearing completion. My stomach growls in appreciation, wanting nothing more than to have its fill of said items.

"You got dirt on your face Em." Jared laughs at me and I growl back at him, clean cut fool wouldn't know how to sleep in the woods if his life depended on it, hell he always looks like he just stepped out of the shower anyway. I roll my eyes and wipe my face with the back of my bare arm.

"Not helping." Paul laughs. "It amazes me you are even able to get a girl, half the time you act like you're a homeless bum."

I laugh, "Jealous Paul, did I manage to take a girl home you didn't sample first." I can't help but smirk at him, arrogant asshole.

"Shut it you dirtball." Paul quips back with a low growl.

"Rather be a dirtball than a horndog,"

"Don't think you can talk much Em." Jake laughs stepping into the room.

"Yeah Embry, there is a reason the local girls avoid you, ya know." Quil laughs, making me want to punch my long time friends, I close my eyes just for a second, regaining my Embryesk composure.

"More like I avoid them I don't want them chasing me around town every chance they get, probably have to beat 'em off with a stick."

"Dinner." Emily yells from the kitchen giving us all the que to rifle through to get some grub.

Leah has been distinctly quiet all night, escaping the craziness that is our pack to make a phone call. What is more important then telling us her news? Anticipation sucks, who ever said it was great never had to wait on Leah and her big secrets. After I finished my food I just flopped back down on the floor, no sense in trying to get a seat on the furniture since the second I get up for something I will lose my spot. Juvenile if you ask me, who am I trying to kid though.

Conversation drones on around me and I am only half listening to the speculations of what Leah's big news is. I am more concerned at the moment with how many cracks are on the ceiling just above my head. I'm up to ten or so but I think I keep losing count.

"I don't have a clue, You don't think she…" I mumble but of course everyone happens to be listening. Yeah what if she did imprint? Would Sam actually be jealous, that his first love found someone else kicking his ass to the curb.

"Really don't think she could hide it do you?" Jake says joining the conversation.

"I know I couldn't hide it from what I hear from you guys, I mean if its like you say then I know I couldn't not think about it." I reply and get a few headshakes at what I am implying hell how could anyone hide the overwhelming lust and love you have to have upon finding your soulmate.

"We're not all perverts like you Em, and its not like that." Quil says pissing me off again. Pervert he is the one with the child for an imprint, talk about messed up.

"Of course its not like that for you, your imprints a child and unless your gonna go all…" Quill cuts me off with a evil looking glare and kicks me in the side, a growl surfaces and it takes all my will power to not take offense to that, hell I guess I was asking for it.

"All we're saying Em, is life isn't a constant string of badly plotted pornos, there is more to it than that." Jared says looking at his imprint with all the love and affection, enough to tranquilize a horse if you ask me. Numbing affection, hmmm?

Probably not badly plotted pornos I give my imagination more credit than that, I'm thinking more along the lines of great pornos mixed in with some comic relief. Geesh, how did we get back to sex anyway we were talking about Leah and she doesn't mesh well in my mind with sex. Not that she isn't worth looking at but I have found myself at the wrong side of her teeth a few times to many to even think about harboring thoughts about her and anything sexual. A cranky Leah makes everyone cranky, not to mention sore in places you don't wish to experience pain in.

Leah's news was just that news, she is getting a new roommate, apparently her friend from college is coming here to live. Any friend of Leah's is a friend of ours unless we want to hear her gripe about it later. She sounds like a complete basket case if you ask me, keeping me away from her won't be a problem. Who wants to meet someone who is that terribly shy, wonder how the poor pathetic thing got through college, aren't those classes held in large groups. I head out the door later with Jake the conversation about Leah's college friend still replaying in my mind.

"Did you seriously have to call her a lesbian?" Jake asks as we head towards his house, my earlier desire to crash on the Clearwater's couch diminished once I pissed Leah off.

"I could have bit my tongue but why punish myself for no reason, it was so great to see that look flare on her face." I laugh until Jake's hand slaps firmly on the back of my head.

"Hey…" Jake grunts at me and I drop it, such a spoil sport sometimes, never know who I am standing next to my friend or a member of the pack hierarchy of assholes.

"Aren't you excited to see someone new?" Jake asks and I can't help but roll my eyes.

"I meet someone new all the time, nothing too exciting about a girl from Ohio is there." I grumble what is the big deal anyhow I could just as likely meet my soul mate at a strip club, plenty of new girls there.

"You wonder and I know it, hell Embry I have known you since we were kids…I can't believe you don't want it."

"That's just the thing Jake I don't think I do, I mean who ever the hell my dad was having a wife and staying faithful to her just didn't work for him, it's in my blood Jake." I sigh and veer off the trail back to Jake's house, avoiding the warm couch to avoid the warm and fuzzy conversation Jake apparently wants to have with me. Maybe I'll crash at Paul's house no deep conversations there.

"You can't avoid me forever Embry we patrol tomorrow night together." Jake calls towards me as I slide through the forest away from him.


	6. Chapter 6

**Okay so here you all go probably a chapter you have all been waiting for i hope it lives up to expectations...It was difficult to write getting into Embry's head is hard to do but thanks to my beta Rabidwolf of Turalyon** **i got it written... So let me know what you think even if it is bad Embry is going through a lot right now so don't take it out on him hahhaa Thanks for your reviews alerts and faves always interested in knowing who is reading :)**

Chapter 6

Jake's threat of our discussion not being over was more than clear as I got my ear full that next night. The guy sure could talk or rather think my ear off on certain topics, love being one of those very things that gets Jake all stirred up. I have to remind myself that he is truly a romantic at heart, the whole Bella thing never totally making sense to me. Imprinting according to Jake is a wonderful thing, not like he would know but I guess he always wishes he had imprinted on Bella thus saving her from the bloodsuckers most intimate embrace, pointy, sharp, and bloodletting. I couldn't stop his mind from spewing all his thoughts on the topic of imprinting or on my views of having a monogamous relationship sometime in the future. Jake never was one of the guys to take casual sex for what it truly is, hell has he even had sex? Not gonna ask that question, knowing how well his seduction attempts with Bella went I don't even what to know how he would handle propositioning a girl for sex if kissing a girl gets him decked.

My own couch tonight has me feeling that much more alone, Leah's new roommate arrived today, hell and I have restrictions on my movement and where I eat dinner. Emily gratefully offered to feed my pathetic ass while the poor girl adjusts to having the pack around. Needless to say everyone is in a constant state of wanting to know more, everyone in the pack is up in arms about an impending imprinting taking place. I think I could careless at the moment, but if I am honest with myself I am curious…she is shy and would be such fun to toy with. Leah would seriously kick my ass, I groan as I stare at the wall across the room from my couch.

I need to go for a run, let out some of my frustrations. I take a deep breath as I step out into the cool but warm air, the sky still just barely light…patrols won't start for a while the woods should be silent enough for me to run as a wolf in peace. I don't shrug out of my shorts until I reach the edge of the tree line and then it takes mere seconds to shed my human form and phase into four legs and fur. I flex my claws against the moist earth relishing in the feel of the ground beneath my paws. The sensations of the world around me flood my senses taking me away from my human thoughts into the realm of the beast that I am. I allow the natural instincts within me to take over submitting to the ideas and urges of the inner animal, the wolf.

My feet are almost silent as I start at a soft and steady pace through the forest, my ears taking in the world around me, flicking towards a rabbit moving in the underbrush. My nose ignores the tickling sensation the close proximity to prey causes in favor for something else entirely. Sweet alluring and downright mouthwatering it is a cross between something my inner wolf desires and something my human brain needs. The pads of my paws pound against the damp earth squelching every so often as I hit a wet spot, my path diverted towards the scent, running on instinct alone now as my brain tries to decipher the meanings behind what I am doing. It must just be a deer, though I know what deer smells like. I brush it off and take in my surroundings and force my feet to slow down, I am nearing town and I can't go much further.

A bird flutters away as I slide to a halt the ground giving way as my claws flex and the mud coats my toes. I flick each of my paws the muck flying off stubbornly, my pads feel heavy and thick despite my lazy efforts. Footsteps my ears pivot forward towards the road and I realize that I am not alone, the road is close I crouch down into the brambles blending in with my surroundings. The rough twigs poke and prod me catching my fur sharply, my nose twitches again, and my head snaps up looking for the source.

I creep forward still down on my hunches with my belly skimming the underbrush and dirt, jumping in the creek might be on my list of things to do later. I take no mind to the brambles matting up my fur, the thorns digging into my skin just slightly as my nose drives me forward towards the road. Movement on the road catches my eye and from my vantage point I get my first glimpse of her.

A sledgehammer it seems knocks me back stunning me as my eyes lock on hers. The sounds around me fade and all I hear is her heart beating, the shallow breaths, and the sound of her feet moving along the road. I smell the smoke emanating from her rich sweet breath, but it is the salty tears on her checks that overpower my senses. She is hurt my mind reels as I take in her appearance. My world though it sounds cliché seems to slow and every part of my soul call out that I want her. Another deep breath her scent washes over me mine, mine, mine perfect opportunity to take her down, her distraction key to catching her off guard forcing her to the ground.

My eyes focus on hers as I try and remember what I am looking at, who I am looking at. I feel dizzy as I feel my focus jarring against me. The girl before me is my world, my life, she is everything that I desire and if not I will force her to become what I want…no. I can't tear my gaze away from her no more than I can control the thoughts in my head. I feel my jaw open, my nostrils flare, as the world as I know it comes crashing down before my eyes. I will have her, she will be mine my thoughts stray again as some semblance of order starts to form and realigns with her at the center. She has no choice. I love her. The thought of me loving someone sends my brain into to a tailspin.

I swallow hard as the thoughts pour over me my imagination taking me places I never dreamed of going. Thoughts unlike myself yet so inexplicably alluring careen through my dazed mind.

The dirt skims her face, my hand snugly against the soft flesh of the back of her neck, her life poised within my very fingers. I feel myself smile at the thought of holding her very life in my grasp, a flick of my wrist and it could be over, the power, the control for once it is mine alone to decide. Salt sweet warmth floods my tongue as I lap up her tears, soaking her face now, her trembling body is tense within my hold. The effort it would take to possess her, take what is rightfully mine is minuscule. The flesh beneath my tongue gives way as my teeth sink into her moist flesh of her neck, copper silkiness invades my mouth as her blood rushes past my lips….

Fuck!

I take off into the woods running far far away as my thoughts come back to me, become more of my own. I have to get away from her, the very thought so similar yet foreign her life in my hands, the threat this time is me. I must get away. I want to vomit, the mere thought of becoming like the vial creatures I am sworn to kill, never my mind cries out against itself, turmoil surmounts as I try and discern what I really am thinking. The air is clear here no longer permeated with her scent and as four legs become two I collapse onto the ground. One thought passes through my head as the cool air and moist ground surround my overheated flesh…I imprinted.

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­

"Embry, hey wake up." I hear Seth's voice slightly and my eyes pop open and I take in his smiling face that isn't quite smiling at the moment.

I groan and roll over instantly missing the warmth of the ground against my naked front. I note several things but the most important at the moment is that it is still dark, night still very heavy in the air.

"What are you doing out here man? Hell, on top of that it looks like you forgot to change into some clothes before you passed out." He crouches down next to me and I peer up at the kid thankful to see a familiar face a member of my pack, "You're not drunk, I can't smell alcohol on you, so why were you passed out?"

"Shit…what time is it?" I mumble suddenly occurring to me where and how I ended up here where ever here is, I ignore his question using it only to help me focus my thoughts on the particulars of my situation.

"Nearly 2 in the morning, Why?" I groan no it's not right, it can't be right, my mind demands answers I don't have accusing myself at the same time mocking the very thoughts that I find in my head to be comforting.

"Come on, man are you in there you are starting to freak me out a bit, Embry?" Seth's voice grounds me a bit bring my focus back to the present as I push all thoughts besides that of Seth completely out of my mind. "You were just zoning out there for a bit."

"I imprinted." I murmur trying to keep myself detached from the words I am speaking, just saying the words floods my mind with various thoughts all of which I don't want to voluntarily think about. Before I can push them all away the nausea comes barreling through my system expelling the remnants of my last meal onto the forest floor.

"Geessh, man imprinting is nothing to get sick over, I mean I know you like playing the field and all but one girl can't be that repulsive to you…who is the lucky lady to snag you?" He laughs but I don't have the energy or will power at the moment to respond to the annoyance I feel though I do hear the growl erupt involuntarily from my throat.

"Larke." Her name slides off my tongue and I almost get sick for an entirely different reasons as part of me ridicules me for having such weak thoughts—love what a joke. I hear the thoughts form in my head but I can scarcely believe my own mind. Nothing is as it should be and nothing is as I dreamt it would be. Love the basis of imprinting shouldn't provoke shame onto myself.

"No shit." Seth's disbelief angers me a little and if I wasn't completely lost in my own enthralling thoughts on the mater I would take time to hit him.

"I need your help, you owe me." I growl at the wimp wanting nothing more than to scare him into compliance. I must sound threatening cause the little punk is looking at me wearily.

"Sure man, I know." Seth says backing up as I rise to my feet, satisfaction floods my senses at the image before me, a slight smile spreads across my face and I force a frown to follow instantly.

"The beach, this afternoon…bring her to me." I mumble absently my control gaining as I try and get a hold of myself. Deep breaths…I smell her on him. The growl starts low and slow as I focus my eyes intently on the smaller man before me. My will power fading as I remind myself that she lives with him, but that only fuels my anger as part of me wonders why my house doesn't smell of her instead.

His eyes dart around the clearing swiftly before settling on me once again, "Sure, will do." He states quickly before he darts off away from me without another glance.

My fist hits the nearest tree the splinters dividing as my knuckles impact the shards of broken wood. It takes a minute before I can control the rage and anger all the while my body trembling with the need to phase. Someone will still be out here and for now my thoughts need to be my own.

I start my walk back to town, my senses tell me that I am indeed pretty far from where I originally started by the road. Patrols will end shortly and I cringe as I remember I am expected to patrol this morning at some point, not likely to happen. I allow the forest overwhelm my thoughts, anything is better than the alternatives.

Every so often a stray thought sneaks into my head about Larke setting off a gamut of emotions ranging from one end of the spectrum to the other. Imprinting I decide isn't what it is cut out to be if the other guys had to work so hard to suppress these other feelings and desires, hell they have damn good control never letting it leak out. Shit…no one could hide this…

I phase into a wolf after a good hour and let out a breath I was holding as I hear the silence in my own mind. The rest of the journey home is quick, almost painless. The second I arrive home I phase back into human and my fist meets the wall, rage and anger pour out of me spurring me almost egging me to continue. I collapse onto the floor defeated as my control surfaces once again, hell I feel like I did the first week I phased except my control over phasing isn't in question this time—my thoughts and emotions are.

How can I find my own love for my imprint weak and undesirable while at the same time wanting things I know are sick and demented beyond reason? I want to see fear in her eyes and know I am the cause, I want to feel her heated gaze upon me and know she desires my love…

I laugh aloud at the absurdity and my head falls downwards to the rough carpet.


	7. Chapter 7

**Okay here is Chapter 7 hope you all like and i love hearing your reviews and seeing any alerts and fves makes me want to update more often Couldn't have writin this chapter with out my wonderful Beta thanks again **

**Without another word or hesitation REAd and EnJOY**

Chapter 7

Drool against my cheek starts to bring me out of my sleep, not that it was restful or anything, plagued with images unreal and tormented with emotions most foul. The first deep breath fills my lungs with dirt dust as a small reminder that I am on the floor of my living room just inside the door. My body crumpled into a very uncomfortable heap, which is no doubt the reason for my achy muscles and the strain in my neck. I slowly pull myself off the floor grimacing at the small lake I formed with my salivating mouth. I grunt audibly at the sticky dirt that seems to be on more than just the carpet and head towards the back of the house to the shower.

A shower would have to clear my thoughts, bring about some sanity into the mind that is claiming to belong to me. Nothing could have prepared me for the thoughts that drove hard into my brain and dreams, I mean I have never wanted to degrade someone like that let alone the one soul I am meant to love. Love ha, I remember feeling as though the mere existence of love is weak and I sigh pushing away all my thoughts, glad for once that at least in human form clearing my head has never been too difficult. Though last night once I phased that was another story, I had to consciously force myself to stay away from the Clearwater's house, the idea that she is mine but has yet to know it pressed heavily down on me as I did my damnedest to return here.

The hot water doing nothing for the rise my thoughts are bringing to me I hastily switch the faucet to cold. I let the water overtake me and pound against my thick skull hoping something will bring me peace of mind.

Seth.

The one thought that brings me hope the damn kid will come through and bring the college girl to me. College girl, damn what was her name? I recall not listening to most of the conversations that night, shit the one time, well not the one time, I tend not to listen a lot but hell it has never come full circle to mock me before. Shit, she is shy, unbearable so, that I do remember and I groan but somewhere inside me I sense sort of a thrill at knowing she will rouse easily.

Leah of all people is going to kick my ass, on top of dragging her little brother into this mess she warned me to keep my distance all but banning me from meeting her until she got to know most of the pack. She spouted off some bull about not wanting her to get a bad impression, as if meeting me would ever scar the girl. Too late, she is mine now. Mine, I think I like the sound of that, owning, possessing, having, keeping, and only time will bring me more wonderful verbs to combine with her name once I remember it that is? I know I said it last night, it slid of my tongue so easily in the heat of the moment but hell now I can see every inch of her in my mind yet recalling her name seems lost to me.

Leah's friend… Seth's new roommate…the sound of that makes me want to growl her roommate is another guy, two actually. The Ohio girl, I know that state but any actual facts about the eastern state don't ring in my head, unimportant. Her name? I growl in frustration making my human vocal chords shout in protest the harsh treatment not being something they prefer. Nothing about this makes any sense it would be my luck…hey that is close 'Laaaaaaaaa'….bird.

I roll my eyes and step out of the shower, no birds I know start with L, but I distinctly feel that bird is the right word. Robin, Sparrow, penguin, Raven, ummmm…La-La. Damn. I give up. I scowl at myself in the mirror before dropping my towel onto the floor and heading towards my room to find something to wear. Not that it matters what girl could resist me, she will be struck by my glorious handsome looks and fall to my feet. I'll know by the look in her eye the second succumbing to me becomes her greatest fantasy, which I will gladly give, or actually it is mine for the taking there is not negotiations.

You don't even know her name, small obstacle sure the girl will be overjoyed to return the favor when I tell her the name of her one and only.

The sun looks like it is getting high in the sky I notice as I pull on the cut off tan shorts and head into the bathroom to run my fingers through my hair in front of the mirror. Yeah, my hair has some length, not really ideal in my wolf form but the familiar feel of having hair is something hard to part with after nearly 16 years of having a full head of hair the buzz cut thing never really suck with me. I don't want to look like a wolf-sized sheepdog so I do watch the length, a trip to the groomers not high on my list and burrs and mud tend to cake in long fur.

I slow my pace and make sure to take the round about way over to first beach, I don't want to run into anyone, I missed patrols already and don't want to hear it I'll deal with Jake or Sam later who ever wants to bitch at me for neglecting my duties. The day is bright though it is starting to get darker outside the sky will look pretty over the horizon deep and rich. I head over to the side of a cliff around the corner from where their scent is coming from down the beach.

My heart is racing at the mere thought of her seeing me, her eyes looking at me and then she will realize who am what I am to her. I lean back against the cliff and wait the cold rock against my back gives me something else to concentrate on rather than her walking alone with Seth. A means to an end I repeat in my head as the two forms come into my view, my will power stops me from running to her and stealing her away. Her eyes are weary as she gets closer those very eyes zone in on me. I see her look me over her mouth parts slightly as I watch the little orbs trail over my body.

"I smirk at her oh yeah she likes what she sees the look only lasts a second  
before she lets her anxiety sweep over her, "Like what you see, Huh?" I  
flash her a grin that usually has all the girls batting their eyelashes at me.  
Inwardly, I smiled softly. I was strangely glad that she was unaccustomed to  
situations like this.

Her forehead winkles a bit and the expression I contributed to anxiety is  
most defiantly now that of anger. Anger what the fuck did I do to her? My fists  
clench at my sides, some thing inside of me stirs wanting to ignore her scowl  
and force her to smile. She can't hate me already hell I only said 5 words  
to her, be it that those 5 words weren't the most polite but she shouldn't  
hold that against me. She is mine to have, and mine to control, so what right  
did she have to be upset with me? She should be hanging all over me, and  
begging for me to take her, which I would more then happily oblige."

I hear my name and my eyes dart back to hers as I realize Seth just introduced us rather formally. "Larke," I whisper her name so quietly she can't hear me, though I bet Seth could all to easily. That boy better watch himself with what is rightfully mine, I feel the urge to growl and somehow I hold back cause the knowledge to keep our ancestral secret firmly ingrained in my mind.

"Great, I met him can we go now?" She mumbles looking behind me instead of directly at me, her voice leaks into my senses calm and serious yet some where behind the surface I hear a stream of hurt, shame, and possibly amusement. Damn, what part of meeting me has her laughing on the inside? Her voice clearly gives it all away. Delving into that mind of hers, hmmmmm, I want to know more, I will know her thoughts, her worries, and what has her hurting and who did it. Hurt what is forever only mine.

"What's your rush you just got here I hope you like to take things a little slower than that?" I rattle off wondering what her response would be, will she give voice to that underlying humorous thought she is holding back on.

"Seth…" She says with a sheer warning that she wants nothing what so ever to do with continuing this conversation. If she thinks, she is leaving this soon she has another thing coming. Why is she being difficult it isn't suppose to be this way? Confess your undying love for me and forget all about Seth and come over here to me. Stand by my side instead of his.

I start to open my mouth to protest Seth taking her away but Seth's voice stops me mid thought, "Sure, sure…Come on Em, Leah said something about making dinner soon."

Dinner Seth is inviting me to eat with them…with Larke. She starts to walk slightly ahead of Seth and I trail behind. I am a bit despondent that she is ahead of me instead of beside me in my arms, though she is no longer beside Seth either.

For someone who is shy she sure gives off enough vibes to get her point across. She didn't even speak to me directly, I wonder what Seth told her about me before they came to the beach. If he screwed this up for me I will have a new wolfskined rug adorning my living room floor, a low growl escapes my throat and Seth's smiling face turns back towards me catching my eye. His gaze doesn't mean shit beyond the warning to keep the growling at bay so I tear my gaze back to her. Her hair sways in the breeze as she walks, her steps determined and confident as she all, but stomps away from me and down the beach. My nose twitches as Leah and Jake's scent assaults me, but the situation could be worse than seeing Jake.

Jake would he even understand, No I doubt it. He hasn't imprinted and couldn't help me if he tried. He is angry I know that much and so is Leah…surprise, surprise Embry is with them. I almost want to laugh and point out their expressions but some how I know my humor will not be tolerated or appreciated at the moment. I hang back a bit letting Seth and Larke reach the two a few steps before me, I close my eyes for the briefest second trying get a hold of myself and everything that has happened in the past 24 hours.


	8. Chapter 8

**Okay here is the next chapter full of drama and hope you like EnJOY reading send me a review if you have time weather you read it or not this story will be written so happy reading thanks again to my Beta rabid wolf of turalyon :)**

Chapter 8

Jake's voice has my eyes focusing on him, a warning and reprimand all in the one word, it is the tone that does it, the authority in his voice almost stops me in my tracks but I force myself not to falter. I hear Seth try and defend me and want to smile at his eager attempts to placate Jake, always wanting to please, always willing to do what ever he can to make the situation better.

Jake's eyes are unsure, wavering slightly even though his confidence echoed in his voice he is obviously still deciding how to deal with Seth and me. I want to say I know he will support me being my friend but as beta of the pack, he has every right to do much more than that.

"Seth, Embry can you please tell me what you think you are doing?" Jake asks us both though strained emotions break through the calm collected front he is trying to throw at us. I know Jake and he can be anything but calm and collected—Jake is emotional, high strung and everything that Sam is not.

"Jake…" I start to say but he cuts me off with another question, hell if he wasn't done why did he stop talking. I clench my jaw as I try and listen instead of telling him off like I would any other time, any other time that he is not acting like he holds all the cards.

"She looked really upset. Explain NOW!" That did it he raised his voice reminding me of nothing good, my chin turns slightly to the side and my fists clench at my sides. Control I need control, but hell this just isn't right.

"I couldn't stay away from her she's MINE." I sneer at him daring him to contest my claim. Beta or not one word disputing me and I won't be able to stop myself. I suppress a growl as I wonder if I could take Jake, always could when we were kids but the outcome notwithstanding the urge to attack is present.

"What?" I hear him say in disbelief and I look up towards the sky as a distraction trying to clear my thoughts.

Seth to the rescue once again does that kid ever give up, hell at least he is still here defending me when my words have all but failed me. Hell, Jake is gonna want me to explain my actions, how in the world am I gonna be able to tell Jake anything? I don't want to see the look in his eyes when he realizes that everything in my mind is wrong. Wrong, corrupt, and without a doubt confusing beyond all recourse, nothing will reprieve me of my thoughts and no one can make it okay for half of my being to want what the other half does not.

I stand there peering at Jake out of the corner of my eye while at the same time trying to control my thoughts, trying to push my thoughts to the back of my brain and keep them away. Fear rolls over me and I wonder if he will look at me differently will the whole pack look at me differently when they know. I just won't ever phase, I will control it and no one will know, everyone will be left in the dark about how morally wrong I am. Just being a shape-shifter essentially makes me that of nightmares, wanting to do what my brain tries to demand makes me literally on the verge of becoming someone's nightmares, Larke's nightmares. She will hate me despise me.

"Let's go talk to Sam." Jake says as his hand claps me on the back, reassuring me at least until he knows the truth. "Seth go home." Great less witnesses, not that they won't all find out anyway.

Seth trots off on his way home leaving Jake and I alone, the sky is more than dark now twilight past and the bats have started to swoop through the air. There is only a few moments of silence between the two of us as we start walking towards Sam's house.

"What were you thinking, Em?" Jake's voice cuts into my thoughts quiet reserved instead of the commanding nature of the last few things he said to me.

Thinking yeah that is a loaded question, what wasn't I thinking about today, last night, and even now?

"I don't think I was Jake…I just didn't know what to do. I'm not suppose to feel like this, I mean it's not anything how the guys described it." I look him in the eye, but only for a brief second not wanting him to see any of what lies behind my eyes. Not ready for the guy I've known as my best friend since I was a kid to look at me with anything other than the myriad of acceptance and understanding that he always has. Freak, deviant, pervert, monster, adjectives pour through my mind at the very things they will call me, so much worse knowing that she too could one day soon think those very words about me.

"This is why you blew off patrols today." He says to me shaking his head slightly the disappointment clear, I wish that was all I was doing was blowing off patrols to get to know my imprint, but no when has my life ever been easy, "You could have told us man, it is nothing to be ashamed of, you should be happy." Shame, yeah you hit the nail on the head there buddy, will you and the pack ever look at me the same again. No.

"That's just it I feel happy that I imprinted, but it's not right I don't know how to describe it." I do but I can't bring myself to say the words, just thinking them is bad enough let alone having the desire to act them out. I can't tell him, how am I gonna tell Sam, oh shit…Sam that is where we are headed. I feel my face pale at the thought of having the very discussion I am trying to avoid with Jake with Sam.

"Okay, lets just get this over with so we can go get some dinner," Jake says causally like we are just going to see Sam and Emily about the patrol schedule or something equally mundane. Not bare my soul to the one guy whose opinion of me I have come to hold dear, the very man that didn't give up on me as I struggled to find my place in this pack.

But eating dinner with Larke, I would get to see her again…distance keep my distance but yes I would see her. My thoughts turn back to the impending conversation as Sam's house comes into view, the last few steps up to the house cause me to falter slightly as I follow falling behind Jake as we close in. The clack of the door signals the finality of what we are doing. My every instinct tells me to run to phase and leave the house, it wouldn't be easy to out run Jake and possibly Sam but I could if I catch them off guard and get a head start.

"What brings you around Jake…Embry?" My eyes lock with Emily's bringing me out of my thoughts of running, her smile holds me in their kitchen dooming me to the inevitable, "Sam's in the living room."

She gives me a oddly reassuring smile I must look pretty down to receive that one I think as I glance away following Jake towards the living room.

"Embry does actually." I catch the last part of Jake's sentence though I bet it has something to do with talking to him, why else would I be here. Jake gives me a little shoveinto the actual room and my sharp intake of a breath and racing heart should give away my feelings if they can't be read plainly on my face.

Sam eyes me suspiciously, as I hesitate purposefully stalling and holding back. Before me Sam is sitting on the couch in his living room, Emily in the kitchen in hearing range, gosh I can't do this. I just want to curl up in the woods somewhere and die than tell Sam what happened, what is happening right now. I should just leave before he sends me away, kicks me off the reservation, and out of everyone lives.

"You missed patrol this morning." He states, what yeah but that is furthest thing from my mind. I find myself nodding and I take a step back most likely in fear. Jake is much closer to me now his elbow knocks into me making me want to growl out a complaint at him. My eyes dart from Jake to Sam and back again as I open my mouth only to close it again.

The look in Sam's eye almost compels me to start talking, I swallow loudly and stammer, "Uh…you see Sam…I was…well last night…" I end with a faint whisper, "I imprinted." The lump in my throat grows as the delightful and happy look spread across his face. The small gasp from the kitchen lets me know Emily heard and I feel like my world is going to end. Chilly tendrils start to over wash my body as I stand there listening to Sam's congratulations and questions. His hand on my back sends me into a heady mix of shame and anger and I instantly distance myself from the two of them, not able to meet either of their eyes. The wall opposite of him holds my gaze as I rake in my emotions and try to push away any thoughts of Larke.

Moments pass and the quiet tension in the room rises as the three of us say nothing, "Uh, Sam could we all just go for a run, it would be so much easier for me to tell you when I don't have to speak?" I spit it out better to be a wolf when it all comes out that way I can just leave here in peace instead of having to deal with goodbyes.

"What aren't you telling me?" Sam is no longer smiling, as he obviously really looks at me for the first time. I still can't look him in the eye though I feel his searching me for any clues to what has me so shaken. I know he is jumping to all the wrong conclusions, but my actual words on the matter are done, one more word and I think I'll break.

A hard shove comes to my shoulder as Jake pushes me towards the back door, decision made a run in the woods, I glance at the clock as we walk by patrols won't start for another couple hours, in the clear for eavesdroppers.

The cold night air assaults me giving me a little reprieve from the emotions that flare deep in my soul. All I register as the three of us walk out to a clearing in the forest are the sounds of the night behind the steady crunching of our feet on the ground.

My steps are indecisive and I stumble several times as we walk, Jake and Sam following me and I am well aware that they both observe my every unsteady step though no words are exchanged between the two of them or me. Never have I been so clumsy even after a few beers, despite my less than graceful walking we make it to the clearing. How did I ever think this was a good idea? Phasing with the intent of explaining it all to them, Shit.

I collapse against a tree as the weight of what is about to happen catches up with me. The rough bark scrapes my back in an almost comforting way, letting me know I am here in my element among the trees, my refuge from the world. My shelter, the place I go knowing it will all be okay, the trees will always stand tall and true despite how many times I fall. The forest understands weakness, thrives on it in a way only the true wilderness can know.

My head falls to my crossed arms enclosing my knees and for the first time since I first saw her I let it all flow in my head, let it all coarse through me, all the evil thoughts, the very ones I push away along with all the adoration and devotion. I let the good and bad mingle in my mind, much to tired to hold any of it back.

The hand on my shoulder is Sam's that much I know, strong and firm, and as I look up my eyes meet his. Calm and concerned his eyes seem to search mine for something though I imagine all he sees is the fear and shame coiling through my very soul at the thought of letting them both inside my head.

"EmbryI don't know what is eating you alive, but know this I am here for you nothing you have done or could do will change that. You are more than just a member of my pack Embry, you are like a little brother to me." He gives my shoulder a hard squeeze before he steps back and I notice for the first time that Jake no longer stands on two feet but has already phased—four legs and furry. I want to smile at hearing Sam's words but I can't bring myself to, silently some part of me doesn't believe him and hearing it now will just make what is inevitable that much worse.

I watch as Sam phases and I take only a moment after that before I stand to shrug of my shorts, "Now or never." I say before I let the wolf enclose over me.

I don't feel like running and I don't I let myself fall to the ground the dirt rough yet moist on my belly as I all but cower on the ground as my mind reels against my actions. I let my thoughts free not pushing anything back. The worst of it all floods my mind as I recall the moments I saw her and it all flashes before their eyes…every thought, every feeling, every action I wanted, it all rolls over me and them there in the clearing. I can't run from it, my breathing is unsteady I notice as I kinda detach myself from my thoughts, sure I still think them and feel them but like anyone I can multitask in my head concentrating on more then one thing at a time, much easier since I became a werewolf though.

It isn't until the questions start coming that I try and focus again letting the words I can't speak flow freely. Sam asks the questions while Jake stays quiet blocking most his thoughts from both of us, though Sam's inquiries are followed by his thoughts. I am soothed a bit by not hearing condemnation in his voice or thoughts, instead his ever present calm radiates through me as his questions become more specific.

"Is it like this always? Do you have any control?" His voice rockets into my mind and I just want it to be over. He isn't telling me how to make it go away, he isn't telling me to get the hell out of his forest, but nonetheless his questions aren't getting me anywhere.

"No. and yes." I answer the last two questions I realize in my human form the aggravation causing me to phase back to get away from his questions. The two wolves before me only last a minute before they too are standing on two legs instead of four. Sam doesn't say a word as we dress and head back to his house. He is speechless for change, yeah reassuring, though his earlier words somehow find their way back to my mind like a broken record.

I meet Sam's eyes for a brief second and the look in his eyes says more than any words could. Jake and I head back towards the Clearwater's house. I see no anger, disgust, or hate in Jake's eyes either as we start back. Only time will tell, whether or not that changes.


	9. Chapter 9

**okay so yeah sorry about not updating....writers block, life, and such the list goes no but mostly i couldn't get into the story...but here ya go hope you like EnJOY REad and Review if you want me to love you forever and ever at least to the point where readers of my stories fall. Smile or life will force you to frown. **

Chapter 9

Never could get accustomed to the way Jake slowly meanders around, almost agonizing now seeing as the Clearwater's house has just come into view. It is a looming presence in the distance almost gives off an ominous feeling, which is not helping my nerves stop festering. The silence between Jake and I is welcomed, hell I wouldn't know what to say to the guy at the moment, he knows, he knows so much and right now only him and Sam know, but not for long. Not for long.

The steps through the door though they take a lot out of me I manage to follow Jake into the dinning room, my eyes meeting Seth's briefly, but no more than half a second. Wordlessly with a jarring elbow to my side and the casting of his eyes, Jake tells me he wants me to talk to Leah, hell no. I no longer have any interest in speaking with any of my fellow pack mates, so I cast my eyes to the floor avoiding any disapproving eyes and head backwards into the living room.

The floor has always provided a suitable place to hide—blend in. The shallow breathing coming from Brady's sleeping form is somehow comforting as my thoughts turn to the whereabouts of Larke. I don't hear any sounds coming from upstairs at the moment though Jake and Leah are climbing the stairs. He is gonna deal with her, taking over where I am once again lacking. Their voices are muffled but without even trying, I hear the end of the conversation, wincing a little as Leah's footsteps descend the stairs.

She doesn't say a word to me but her glare says it all and then some, my thoughts turn towards what her thoughts could be this very second though that doesn't last but because she enters the house. The slight ting of tobacco and cigarette smoke fills my nostrils reminding me that she smokes, right that must be stopped. I can't have her smelling like smoke, it smells cheap and reminds me of the girls from the bar. No, she is not just another girl from the bar, she is mine.

She will not endanger her life that way, I just won't have it. Calm, calm I must keep calm…my hand grips the molding on the wall behind me, my fingers denting it just slightly, but it does the trick. She hasn't even talked to me, I can't just go over there and demand she stop smoking. Gain her trust…first priority part of me screams and I push down those other thoughts that degrade my more rational side for even thinking that trust significant—fear is better motivation. I wince at my own thoughts for a second before I pull myself up off the floor to join everyone in the dinning room for super.

The diner table seems tense, Leah's eyes cold and narrow glaring at me and Jake with occasional accusatory looks at Seth. Jake throws solid glances at all of us while my eyes only want to focus on Larke, but I don't want her to know. I can't freak her out, yet.

The crash against the plate has all of us shocked as Larke storms out of the room.

Shock, confusion, and plain disbelief flood my senses. What set the girl off I have no clue? My actions and those of the rest of us were neutral at the least but nowhere near offensive. Hell, we didn't even say a word, let alone say anything that could warrant such an outward display.

"Calm down, man she is just stressed." I hear Jake say trying to placate me or ease my nerves.

Of course, she is stressed, "I know, it is just hard knowing I'm part of the cause." I mumble and take a desperate interest in the remaining food on my plate, not willing to look any of my fellow wolves in the eye. My thoughts turn away from my self-loathing long enough for me to become even more disgusted with myself, if only I could have a partial lobotomy or something to get rid of half my brain.

As Leah shoves her plate across the table she starts what I hope is a short rant, "Part of it, Yeah, Right, more like the main cause."

My body involuntarily brings me up out of my seat and into a defensive position, "Look, I know I screwed up, but I wasn't clearly thinking…"

Leah stands now her chair toppling backwards against the momentum, "Thinking is that what you were trying to do…maybe you should just forget about Larke and go back to that bar you love so much. You know the one with all the whores throwing themselves at your feet." Her voice seers into me taking away my will and making me feel as big as an ant.

"I can't" It comes out with as a defeated whisper instead of the confidant voice the same words were spoken in my head.

"Leah don't be like this." Jake pops in standing up for me.

"How am I supposed to act, Jake, when you tell me that Embry is a bipolar schizo nutcase that imprinted on my best friend." The crash in the sink makes me cringe a little, Leah's temper isn't something to mess with, "not to mention, Embry, you are the epitome of everything Larke hates in men."

Hate the very word I dreaded hearing, the worse possible outcome of this whole situation, "She hates me." I acknowledge aloud more to myself than to anyone else.

I listen with half an ear as Jake reminds Leah that she knows me, and she can still trust me. I wonder if she really can, am I still trustworthy around Larke? Will Leah think that when she knows it all. She will be privy to any detail she wants my brain and actions are an open book to the pack when I phase.

Jake's pep talk or what ever you want to call it must be working cause Leah appears physically calmer, but it still doesn't leave me wanting to be alone with the girl. Before I know it I am following Jake out the back door, he apparently wants words with me, advice I will welcome but anymore criticism and I might just take it to heart.

"She doesn't hate you, Em…" Jake sighs, where does he get his information from?

"How the fuck do you know what she thinks!" My mind reels at the thought of Jake knowing more about her than me, she is mine and damn it I will have her. Focus, I give my head a quick jerk and concentrate on Jake instead of the thoughts he is provoking within me.

"I don't know but you can't just give up, she's your imprint for Christ's sake. Regardless of whether she likes you or not you can't live without her…" Give up, gods…this is so confusing nothing is making much sense right now. I want to pound my brain against the ground making an Embry shaped hole in the ground, and then pull the dirt down on top of me.

"You think I don't know that Jake, I'm seriously messed up right now…every other thought in my head makes me cringe depending on what state of mind I am in. The thought of loving her, protecting her, caring for her even those thoughts I have found myself recoiling at certain moments. I don't know what is wrong with me Jake, it's not supposed to be like this…how can I live with myself knowing that some part of me wants to force myself on her and control her every action like some kind of sadistic maniac."

"Embry you can get past this…I know, deep down you love her, and wouldn't let anything bad happen to her…" Jake's voice doesn't give off any of the apprehension I know he must be feeling.

"You don't know what it is like, it is mind numbing the way I feel when I can't control myself, it is like something creeps up inside my mind and forces my rational thoughts far away so that it takes every ounce of my being to pull myself together just to stop." Yeah, just a few seconds ago I had thoughts that you were competition for my mate. Mate, huh that's a new thought…mine.

"I don't know what I would have done if Seth hadn't found me last night…" I whisper turning away from Jake as I become disgusted with my own thoughts and a little fearful of such actions taking over me.

"He did and you have all of us for support Embry…trust me, trust the pack, and trust yourself to be able to handle this." I turn back around looking Jake in the eye one more time wanting my friend's reassurances to me heartfelt instead of hallow. I am not disappointed; his eyes hold the sincerity I needed.

"Why can't my life just be simple, every time I think I am just cruising down a straight road there it comes, a curve in the road, and I just can't slow down I have charge forward at full throttle and endure the consequences. I wish for once I could just heed the caution signs."

"Well, caution has never really been your thing…I'll see ya tomorrow, don't do anything I wouldn't do." He warns as he turns away leaving me in the dark woods alone once again with just my thoughts to torment and taunt me.

I walk back towards the Clearwater's house almost on autopilot, nothing could stop my feet from leading me there. I hunker down in the backyard, the light from her window peaking around the shade lures me in. My eyes are glued to that sliver of light as I settle in along the tree line to wait and watch the closest I could get right now—spying on her like some damned stalker. A low growl starts to rumble as I realize how I would look if she caught me out here in the trees eyeing her window. The idea of her thinking poorly about me is not sitting well, but yet knowing that I could intimidate her has part of me getting beyond giddy.

I don't last long sitting in the trees the stalker idea creeping my own brain out and it forces me into the living room. The dark depths of the living room, so full of her scent. I settle in on the couch silently listening to her music which I can clearly hear as if it were on in the other room not upstairs behind closed doors, my thoughts so all consuming outside the music didn't even register as something I could hear. I wait, imagine what I would say if perhaps she would come downstairs and see me. In my head I sound perfect and she swoons over me with perfect rhyme and reason submitting to my will and becoming mine without another thought. Fantasies are just that full of unmistakable fiction and hallow promises of happy endings.

Wait…the music shuts off, it is now or never maybe I should head upstairs and knock on her door. Stupid, stupid, stupid that would just make her hate me more.

The creak of her door has me stilling in my seat and her footsteps on the hallway floor cause me to stop breathing altogether. She is coming down here, what a dream come true—she is all mine. Alone with nowhere to run to and if she does I will follow. No one will stop me from having her all to myself for as long as I can. Mine, mine, mine, mine the voice in my head chants in time with her footsteps. My enhanced vision allows me to track her movements first down the stairs and then into the kitchen,

The shlick of the freezer opening has my brain momentarily focusing on food rather than the girl who I call my own despite her reluctance to submit to me.

She approaches and though I smell ice cream it is the least of my concerns, her weight on the couch surprises me until I realize she can't see me or here me. Her scent washes over me, my eyes wanting to roll into the back of my head with every intake of a breath. She is so close and then the click of the table light, the thunk her the ice cream tube, and the most adorable gasp have me focusing once again.

"Hello, Larke." Rolls off my tongue and I reach for her snack as a smirk appears on my lips, a slightly satisfied splendor courses through me at seeing her, here now and alone. There are no harpies to run interference, no overprotective nuisances to drive me away.

"Are you trying to scare me to death?" She gasps snatching the ice cream from my hands.

Hmmm, interesting, "Not my sole intention, No…feeling better I imagine since you've ventured down." Making her heart beat fast has a certain appeal to it, knowing she is vulnerable after the front she gave this afternoon is surprising and has a certain pleasing quality to it.

She whispers as if she will disturb someone, "Why are you still here?"

Loaded question…better keep this PG as much as I think I am liking this feeling of having power over her I think for my sanity and hers I better rein it in a bit she is not ready to know what is going on in my head,"I've been waiting for you, of course." I can't help but smile, "you ran off before I had a chance to talk with you…so I thought I would wait until you had no where to run to." Hmmm, her heart is beating faster yet…is she scared or is she nervous? I don't doubt a bit of both.

"I can still run from you…" She tries to convince herself more than me, trapped like a coon in a tree, nowhere to go…prey, my prey.

"But you won't." I reply with a hint of amusement. "because if you do there is no one to stop me from following this time." I say serious once again she has to know I can't let her leave me, not now not ever.

Her eyes I catch a glimpse but she is straining not to make eye contact with me. Oh, yes I am making her afraid…I can smell it on her now…but just a slight hint. I catch her eye this time as she glances at me, she looks away quickly making part of me rejoice at her quiet submission, but damn I want her to look me in the eye and see me, want me, and choose me. I do not want her fear.

"Do I frighten you, Larke?" I ask bracing myself for the answer, wanting her to answer with a negative response when I know damn well that would be me dreaming again.

"Yes, Embry, in fact, you do…you were hiding in a dark room waiting for me in the off chance that I would come downstairs tonight, if that doesn't scare me. What should?" Her false bravado has me wondering where these little outbursts come from, shy, timid and almost down right passive to defiant and lively in the course of mere minutes. Her ice cream comes to her lips again and I wish I were the spoon, a taste so sweet, the first chance to inquire what she tastes like. I want to close my eyes and do just that now, focus asshole not quite the way to get her to like you, damn it I'm am such an ass.

"It has never been my intention to scare you…" I say trying to please her letting her know my intentions were honorable, "although now that I have I find it oddly satisfying, but alas I also do not want to make you hate me so if you wish I shall attempt to refrain from scaring you." I say and stick the proverbial foot in my mouth at the same time, "at least for now." I whisper more to myself to please the deranged voice wanting to usurp control.

"What did you want to talk to me about?" She asks, is that an invitation to talk to her?

My excitement level increases as my hopes rise within me and I inch closer to her wanting to feel her skin against mine, to feel her body so close, my hopes rapidly diminish as she squeaks, "I thought you didn't want to scare me?" She shrinks into the side of the couch trying to get away form me I realize and once again I am overcome with a sense of loss.

"Sorry…" I mumble closing my eyes to still the ever-present tormentor in my head.

"It's just that I don't do to well with people I don't know and sitting here now with you is taking a lot out of me so if you want to talk to me could you please sit over there or somewhere that is not so close." She says in a hushed tone that is laced with frustration and anxiety.

I am about baffled by the fact that she told me that, told me outright what was wrong. Straight forward and yet it is somehow just wrong that she doesn't want me close. It is beyond great that she is so shy, hell what do I have to worry about someone else moving in on what is so rightfully mine. Mine with a capital M.

Okay so I move back a couple feet, taking a non-threatening pose with my legs crossed beneath me and my hands both in clear view with my elbows resting on my knees. I watch her reactions to my every move and as the fear and discomfort are replaced with only a slight contempt and hesitancy, I want to whoop at my triumphant accomplishment no matter how small. I hide my surprise as she adjusts her body to mimic my pose, the melting ice cream seemingly more important than me. Not good, I need to remedy that…

That ice cream is mine too, "Are you gonna eat that?" I ask with a falsely sheepish twang.

Victory is mine as her laugh fills the air in response to something I said, me, Embry Call managed to make her laugh. Wait why is she laughing…maybe she is laughing at my expense.

Shit. Where did all this indecision come from?

"No, do you want it." She asks halting my brain from stalling and overheating from my indecisiveness.

I retrieve the cardboard container from her hand refraining from touching her skin and drain the carton like the milkshake it had become in a few gulps.

After setting the carton on the floor I decision I need to say something, "Thanks…so uh why did you run away from me at the beach earlier?" Okay, so not quite the best thing to ask but my brain doesn't always process what my mouth wants to say. Regret washes over me as the seconds tick by before she answers, stupid question.

"Because believe it or not, not all girls go for the arrogant asshole vibe you put out…I've know way too many guys like you." Whoa, there she goes again shedding that shy persona she clings to most of the time. Arrogant asshole, unacceptable part of me growls but instead of a growl I force a laugh.

"Guys like me huh…What type of guy am I? I keep the humor light enough I hope that my frustration doesn't show through.

"You know what type of guy you are…you use girls for nothing other than a good time in bed, it's written all over your face."

My fingers drag though my hair nervously but not for why you think, nervous about being able to over come this and nervous about screwing up—haven't felt this tongue tied since jr. high school.

There is not point in thinking, I'll just let my mouth run away with itself, "Well, I don't just have a healthy appetite for food you know…what else am I supposed to do? It's not like anyone gets hurt girls know I'm just in it for the sex, you know a one night stand, no strings attached."

Clearly this is not going well, she is scowling at me now as I defend something I know I don't want anyone. Ironic isn't it arguing for something I clearly was and don't want to be again more. She is the only girl I want.

"It's not really what you do that bothers me, I guess it's how you act because of it." She points out to me like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

A frown graces my lips in more of a confused contemplation than anything else. She is outraged that I am an arrogant asshole that she thinks uses women, yet she contradicts herself by saying that isn't what bothers her. It is like she doesn't want me to be offended or something.

"You know you're trying to be outraged." There goes my diarrhea of the mouth again.

"What do you mean trying? I do not like you or the way you act so I'm not trying to be anything."

My eyes roll at the slight anger that must be for something more important to her than my pervious sexual activity. She firms her lips as if in thought about something before fidgeting just slightly.

"You know talking to you isn't as hard as I thought it would be, considering you exhibit every quality that I loathe in a guy," I smiles her as the emotions roll through me, "must be because of that…you know no pressure could careless if you ever talk to me again."

My whole body tense at the sound of her words, my body starts to quake under my skin and I know I must calm down or lose her forever. Changing into my wolf in front of her would not only out our whole pack but also ruin my chances of getting to know my imprint. It isn't easy as I squash the beast down.

I have to know right now I have to know if she wants me to stay away, I'll chain myself in my house to make her happy. The pack can bring me food and treat me like a beloved pet. Now or never I have to ask, "One more question before I allow you to go back to bed…Do you mind if I come around when you are here?" My eyes shut against the onslaught of my anxiety as I wait for the one word answer.

She is off the couch making her escape without answering me, my heart sinks and I know that those chains will never hold. She will be mine, she will be the one chained up in my house, to my bed to be more specific. Mine, a growl threatens to rise and I grip the couch tightly for control.

"No…I don't think I mind as long as you keep your distance, you know personal space is a pet peeve of mine."

I watch her make her get away up the stairs and the second she is out of sight I make my break for the woods behind the house.


End file.
